What the Facebook photos don't tell you

Someone once said to me "You have a perfect life, I can tell from your Facebook." 

They told me that every time they saw my photos and read my updates that they were envious of me and the life I appeared to be living. 

It was a time in my life when things were really tough. I couldn't allow the outside world a glimpse into what I was really feeling.So in an attempt to hide, I filled my profile with the cuteness of my newborn and the fun family activities we did together. I checked into restaurants and cafes  and wrote about the 'mummy who lunches'. I didn't mention the whole days spent locked in the house because I couldn't bear to leave. The rocking and crying, trying to self soothe while the baby screamed for coming on 12 hours. I neglected to mention the guilt I felt for not feeling lucky, privileged and blessed when everyone around me expected me to. I didn't talk about the sleep deprivation and being up every two hours for the first 6 months, except for the occasional light-hearted comment like 'why won't this baby sleep?'

I didn't check- in when I visited the Post Natal Depression service. Instead I spoke about this new 'creche' I was taking JC to in Edinburgh. During my post counselling reflection time my status update would read 'sitting in Starbucks, enjoying an Iced Frappe'. I didn't think that 'I've just bared my soul and confessed my thoughts to a stranger and now I'm dwelling on what issues I've raised for myself' would be comfortable status for others to read. 

Time wore on, I started blogging, things got better. I was cured. 

Cue the well timed and expected scan photo with the 'We are due baby no 2 in Sept!!' update. 

I'm telling myself that it's going to be different this time. I've moved house, I'm near my family, I have great neighbours, I have more friends around me, I have knowledge and experience, I'm a few years older, my husband has matured and might be in a better place to support me, I have my blog and most importantly, I got through it the first time and felt better on the other side. 

I've been more honest throughout this pregnancy. I've posted more on social networks about the trials and tribulations of my pregnancy, making no bones about the fact that I don't carry babies well. Although I keep healthy and thankfully have no serious issues, I have had the usual pregnancy symptoms which I really don't enjoy. Throw into the mix a very precocious toddler who is testing every last ounce of patience I have left. I probably come across to my FB friends as a moaner but at least it's real. 

I worry about how I will cope with two children. There are days when I feel I am not coping very well with one. I wish I could be more laid back and relaxed. It's just not my personality. I'm trying to juggle a full time career with motherhood. It's not easy and there are days when I wish I could afford to be at home or be more efficient at managing my life. 

I look at the photos of other mums on Facebook and think "You have a perfect life, I can tell from your Facebook." - Ah!

Super Soft Skin

It's been a bit of a battle with my skin really since falling pregnant the first time with JC. I'm quite lucky in that I'm not overly susceptible to stretch marks (apart from the ones I already have through weight loss and gain) but I have much drier and irritated skin in certain areas. The worst area is my hands as they are in water so often. I blame the anti bac gel I used when JC was a tiny baby. It really dried out my skin as I think it was just too harsh for me.

I was recently asked to review two skincare products by Vaseline. The first product was a Cocoa Butter Oil Gel. Brimming with Brazil nut oil to lock in moisture and paired with almond oil which its natural minerals and antioxidants to keep skin pampered, it is full of oiliness to soften even the toughest of skin. Coleen Rooney has recently mentioned this product as one of her pregnancy must haves to keep her skin in tip top shape. It retails at £5.10 which I think is a really reasonable price.

The first thing I noticed about this product was the gorgeous smell. One of my kids at school even commented on the smell several hours after applying. She thought I was wearing sun cream as the smell is one of summer days and not too far removed from that delightful coconut smell you find with most sun creams. You only need a small amount and I can imagine that the generously sized bottle will last a while. I have used it for a week and there is only a small amount gone from the top of the bottle. My only issue with it is that it is quite oily and takes a while to absorb into the skin. The first few days of use were through the day but then I changed to using it at night which was better. It is perfect for those areas that are really dry. It worked wonders on my crocodile skin on my feet and legs! I would recommend this product and will buy it again but would probably use it on certain target areas.

The second product was a revelation for me! As a mum and a primary school teacher, I come into contact with many bugs that transfer on hands and surfaces. My hands are not able to cope with the strength of some anti bac gels and constant hand washing isn't good for me either. Vaseline's 2-in-1 Hand Cream + Anti Bac is the answer. It combines 5 moisturisers with a germ sanitiser which keeps hands protected from germs whilst keeping them super soft. Unlike most of the other hand gels and anti bac creams I've tried, this one doesn't dry out my hands and its smells lovely. It's in a handy wee bottle and I have taken to carrying it around in my handbag. It will be a godsend when the baby comes along too. It's only £3.29 and both products are available from leading supermarkets including Superdrug and Boots.

Overall, two fab products which will hopefully keep my skin glowing throughout pregnancy and beyond. I would recommend both although the hand cream is my personal favourite!

This is not a sponsored post, I received a free sample of the product but all comments and opinions are my own. 

An Audience With JC

JC is now 2 years 9 months and this has to be the most wonderful stage. We seem to have turned a corner with the behaviour side of things (dare I say it!) and he has taken to toilet training with little trouble. Don't get me wrong there are challenges, days when I feel like screaming at him when he point blank refuses to do a thing he's asked to. Some days when it's like he's had an injection of pure sugar and is completely out the box with energy. In balance though, there are days when he is an absolute joy to spend time with. One of my favourite aspects at the moment are his conversational skills.

He has always been a good talker but recently has started to hold proper conversations with me. I am so glad he's a chatterbox like me! 

Here is a video of his most recent ponderings . . . he goes from discussing his dinosaurs to Santa to heaven. My Grandad died a fortnight ago and it's been a really hard time with other losses around me  (hence the lack of blogging). This light hearted interview with JC really cheered me up!

I love that boy!

Things I Forgot About Being Pregnant

I have just entered my 2nd trimester so by rights, I should have a blue peter badge for all the crap I've put up with over the past 12 weeks. Here is my own little list of things that I must have forgot about when I decided that I missed being pregnant . . .

• Vomiting - there is nothing quite like having to stop the car to puke at the side of the road, classy. 
• Nose like a Basset hound - I can smell a Mc Donalds within a 5 mile radius, it's a gift. The smell of dirty hands causes me to gag but the smell of rubber is pleasantly appealing. This new super sense can be problematic. For example, sitting through an 8 hour course and all you can smell are the feet of the person to your right. 
• Tiredness - So much so, you don't even realise you are tired until you do that nodding dog thing or someone rudely awakens you an hour later. 
• Potty Mouth - everything you eat leaves an ugly after taste, even toothpaste. 
• The Little Voices - there is the constant chatter or what ifs or should, would, coulds that drive you to distraction and keep you up at night. 
• Zero Sex Drive - the thought is as appealing as ice fishing whilst naked. 
• Broken Thermostat - from hot sweaty boobs to chittering with 2 jerseys and a coat on. 
• Sensitive Gums - bye bye crunchy crisps.
• There's an app for that - the compulsive need to check baby apps to see what body part you are growing this week. "ooh, week 9 is balls all round with eyeballs and testicles developing. 
• Horror Mones - a permeating bolshiness overriding everything I do and say.  
• Sweet Dreams - I think not! Waking up in the morning either in floods of tears or with uncontrollable rage due to the vividness of last nights dream. He is in for it for the rest of the day! 
• Cravings - watermelon is delicious, especially when paired with pickled onions and raw lemons.
• Persistent Peeing - I fear I might dehydrate. 
• Acne - mostly on my scalp and back, how attractive.
• Compulsive Crying - adverts about things like paint or washing powder get me going.

On that note, this post is really quite a pity party, I'm going to go cry in a corner somewhere. Roll on the blooming stage of trimester 2. It's really about time I was glowing!

I also forgot that I will look as big as whale in a few months . . .

This One Is My Favourite!

Although I am an advocate for Baby Led Weaning, I have made no secret about my love for Ella's Kitchen products. I used the baby food and fruit pouches from time to time when I was travelling with JC or as a standby in the cupboard.

They recently got in touch with me and asked if we would like to try their new range of Big Tastes dairy products. Here is a picture of Ella's Dad driving the worlds smallest milk float delivering delicious dairy delights to children in the London area.

I decided that we would try the yoghurts as we have already reviewed the fromage frais in a previous post and JC is not overly keen on rice pudding. 

The Taste Test

Here is what I liked about it

• Great size - some yoghurts are far too small that JC often eats 2 or 3 at a time!
• Pot shape - the pot is quite wide so it's easy for little hands to get the spoon in and manipulate the yoghurt onto the spoon. 
• The taste - I had a sneaky taste and I liked the tangy flavour. It is a thick and creamy texture.
• The Ingredients - 20% real fruit, no added sugar, organic milk and fruit.

What's not so great

• Price - the only downside is the price which is £1.79 for 4 pots. The yoghurts that I normally buy are £1 for 6 small pots. This might not actually be a great deal considering he would eat 3 in one go as there is hardly anything in them and the ones at this price are usually full of refined sugar. 

This is not a sponsored post. I received a free sample of the yoghurt but all opinions are my own. 

Baby Grumpinator

I've been hiding something from you.

Baby Grumpinator Round 2
Due Sept 5th

We are very excited!

6/52 - Tranquility of the Outdoors

My favourite day of the week this week had to be Friday. These were also my favourite photos. John and I took advantage of the improving weather and went out for a walk. It was more like a run! He ran most of the route with exception of the hill at the end.

We both love the outdoors and I think it calms us. I've always found it very therapeutic to walk, especially down the farm roads.

It takes me back to a special time in my youth where I would bomb round the farm on my bike, wind in my hair, stinging my cheeks, blowing the cobwebs away. The sweet smell of nature hanging in the air with the feeling of being part of that nature. I used to call these my 'oneness' moments. To be truly in the moment and savouring life. I can only imagine that this is the feeling of mindfulness that people who practise meditation experience. I hope I can pass this feeling of tranquility onto JC but in the meantime he is savouring the joy of being outdoors and all the fun it has to offer.

I'm linking this post up with Country Kids and The Boy and Me's 365.